We Are Family by Liz Flaherty

My friend Nan Reinhardt and I were talking after another writer posted a question on Facebook that asked about families. Most of us have different ones, don't we? They're comprised of relatives, church families, work families, even neighborhood ones. 

And writer ones.

I remember when RWA felt like a family. Although it was huge, every meeting I ever attended--no matter which chapter and whether I was a member of it or not--felt both welcoming and accepting. We talked writing, we critiqued, we held each other up--all things families do. At conferences, we talked endlessly, learned from each other, schmoozed. We met editors and agents and--oh, joy!--sometimes we got asked for a complete. Oh, and we drank, too--that was incidental, but it sure gave me an appreciation of hotel bars!

Spring Fling 2014

But my writing family has shrunk. The in-person family, I mean. While I enjoy the Facebook groups I'm a part of, I haven't been to a conference in years. Until AARP sponsors one, I probably won't. Just as I can no longer write 20-something heroines, neither do I have much in common with younger writers at conferences. Some of that is envy on my part--I miss being in that demographic, no matter how much I enjoy being the age I am now--and part of it is that I haven't kept  up with how the industry has changed. 

It's nobody's fault, but do I wish there were 50-and-over writers' conferences? You bet.

Segue here... If you want to make jokes now about things like going to bed at 9:30, charging hearing aids, making sure we know where our canes and walkers are, and carrying an arsenal of both prescription and OTC drugs, go ahead. We joke about them, too, although some or all those things are facts of our lives and they're really no big deal. 

Okay, back to the post... So, at least as far as in-person connections go, my romance writing family is mostly just Nan and me. We have work days and biannual retreats and we both count on those things. We're also long-time besties, which counts for a lot all by itself. 

Nan and Me

We've done some researching, and we think we're going to try to go to one of the smaller conferences next year and/or possibly join a retreat like this one https://michiganromancewriters.org/retreat-from-harsh-reality/. 

Jana Richards

Talk to us about your writing families. Suggest conferences and retreats. While you're at it, stop in at Word Wranglers and read Jana Richards's post on retreats. 

Slow and Easy by Liz Flaherty

One of the things that has happened to me as I've gone along is that everything has slowed down. I used to write so fast--it wasn't always good, but it was fast--and now I'm thrilled with 500-word days. No, actually, I'm thrilled with 300-word days. Sigh. 

Reading has slowed just as much. I've gone from reading several books a week to finishing a couple a month. I may start more than a couple, but I don't always finish them. With slowness comes lack of focus. I skim a lot. I don't do justice to the people who put their hearts and souls into their work. Be assured it's me, not them.

But every now and then...

My friend Margie Senechal, one of the charter members of the Word Wranglers blog, has a recently finished manuscript called Suitcases. She honored me by asking me to be a beta reader of the story. I'd read pieces of it during the writing of it, but sometimes...sometimes you need the whole thing. 

I don't use the word honored lightly. 

Suitcases isn't what I normally read, but, you know, I can--for a friend. There is the indisputable fact that a part of me wanted to love this book simply because I love Margie, but it went well beyond that. Analisa and Danny grabbed hold of me and didn't let go until I'd read the last words of their story.

It made me happy not just because it's Margie's story or because, voila, I finished a book, but because even though the reading was slow, the pleasure was as intense as it's always been. 

It made me think about writing--doesn't everything? I realized that even though I don't write fast anymore, that particular pleasure...the one that comes with creation and spending quality time with friends no one but you knows yet...is just as intense as it always was. Just as exciting. 

Thanks, Margie, for the honor and for making me remember how much I love both reading and writing. And being slow is just fine.