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Sunday, July 28, 2019

Need a Laugh?

These funny Mom texts (below) gave me a hearty chuckle. I totally get the difficulty with texting (autocorrect) and haven't even attempted voice text. Navigating the world of acronyms and emoticons is perilous. Uncharted territory. My advice: 'when in doubt, don't'.  But you can't always help it. Like yesterday, I'm  in the garden taking flower pics with my nifty iPhone (from my last birthday) when I spot weeds taunting me. I tuck the phone under my arm and bend down. After a few minutes an alarm blares. I'm so startled I nearly fall into the beans I haven't picked. Yet. I will.

What the heck? It's coming from my phone and there's a red emergency SOS threatening to send. Or did it already go out? Insert panicked bad word here.
I can't turn the phone off fast enough. Are cop cars gonna roll into my yard demanding the nature of my emergency? I didn't even know the phone had an alarm, let alone how to engage it. I do now.
What a monster this deceptively innocent device can be.
Oh, and then there's the whole Mom Memory lapse thing. I nearly forgot to mention it.
Fortunately, like the moms in my post, I'm blessed with helpful kids. My daughter Alison's silly goats worked best image wise. It looks like they're amused, or can't believe their eyes. I've included some 'best of' text exchanges between moms and their offspring.
Mom: Hi Bridget I space space space space how space are space you space doing period capitol eye love this new phone exclamation point
Bridget: I see you're using voice text. You don't have to say space Mom it does it for you.
Mom: I cucumber lettuce pea Ritalin
Bridget: What? Mom stop just type.
****

Mom:  What does IDK, LY and TTYL mean?
Daughter:  I don't know, love you, talk to you later.
Mom:  OK, I will ask you sister.
****
Mom: Andy, I can't find my phone. Can you call it so I can track it down?
Andy: I don't even have time to be quippy, Mom. It's in your hand.
Mom: What? No it's not. I've got a bag of groceries in my hand. Are you saying it's in the grocery bag? How do you know these things?
Andy: WHAT ARE YOU TEXTING ME WITH?
Mom: Never mind. I found it. Thanks!
****
Daughter: Mom where are you???
Mom: Leaving Walmart. Halfway home. Why sweetie?
Daughter: You brought me to Walmart with you...
Mom: Oh DARN! Be there in a bit!
Madre: I left my friggin charger in Dayton.
Mom: Do you know how worried I've been?
Madre: Mom I'm sorry. I couldn't get a hold of you.
Mom: I almost broke the treaty to be sure you were OK.
Madre: What treaty? MOM ARE YOU QUOTING TWILIGHT AT ME?
Mom: Yes.
****
Mom: Your great Aunt just passed away. LOL
David: Why is that funny?
Mom: It's not funny David! What do you mean?
David: Mom lol means laughing out loud!
Mom: Oh my goodness! I sent that to everyone. I thought it meant lots of love! I have to call everyone back. Oh God.
****
Mom: Please stop changing the google logo so much. I like the original one.
Son: Mom I don't change the logo. Google changes it.
Mom: You don't run the google?
Son: If I did I wouldn't be driving a 2004 ford.
Son to his Mum:
Finally, you've entered the digital age and got a smartphone!
How is it?
Mum?
Helloooooo???
Why aren't you answering?
Mum: Howdoyoudoaspace?
****
Son: Got an A in chemistry!
Mom: WTF, well done!!
Son: What do you think WTF means?
Mom: Well that's fantastic!
****
Mom: Good morning beautiful. :) xoxo Your imaginary boyfriend.
Daughter: Thanks Mom
Mom: Hi Honey how was your day? 8=======D
Daughter: WTF Mom! Why'd you type a penis emoticon???
Mom: I don't know what you mean. 8=======D is an alien smiley face.
Daughter: No it's not! It's a penis. Who told you that?
Mom: Well I saw it in some of your brother's texts to his girlfriend and when I asked he said it was an alien. Wait so 8=======D~ { (0) } isn't a space alien getting on a ship?
Daughter: No Mom it isn't.
****
Mom: I'm learning how to hashtag!
Son: That's great, Mom.
Mom: Hashtag conversation with son
****


There are a lot of these hilarious Mom texts online. I laughed out loud. LOL.
I don't write comedy but I do have a keen sense of humor which comes out in my books. For more on me please follow my Amazon Author Page:
https://www.amazon.com/Beth-Trissel/e/B002BLLAJ6


***Goats like to sit on rather than in their house.

5 comments:

  1. Thanks for the laughs! Carol Brownell

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  2. Love! The Twilight one nearly made me spit out my coffee! The goats were an inspired choice! Their faces are *so* expressive!

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  3. Yes and yes. Thanks. I had such fun doing this post.

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  4. I love your posts, Beth. Those goats do look as if they're smiling. You always have great photos.

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