By Kathy Shaw
I don’t
like sex.
Wait! Back
up. I left out a word!
What I
meant to say was: I don’t like to write
sex. (Love ya, Honey!)
There are
two kinds of sex scenes. The bad ones and the good ones. I’m going to review
the good and the bad and totally ignore the ugly of sex scenes.
Please
remember the following statements are just my humble opinions. That said I feel
I should warn you, I’m one of those people who believes if I have an opinion
everyone is entitled to hear it.
Let’s talk
about the bad. You know, the sex scenes where we have four pages of tab A into
slot B with no emotions in sight. Now grant you, there’s nothing wrong with
this if you’re wanting to read (or write) a “sex” scene. These kinds of scenes
are jarring to me when I’m knee-deep into a “romance” novel, but they have
their place in the right genre.
And then
there are those scenes that reside on the opposite end of the spectrum. Passionate
emotions pour from the couple with the fervor of Romeo and Juliet, Lancelot and
Guinevere, and Tarzan and Jane all rolled up in one. Okay, maybe not the jungle
couple, but you get my drift.
They wax on
to near nauseam about the depth of their partner’s blue eyes or the shine of
their golden locks or maybe the smell of vanilla and sunshine that radiates
from their every pore—or some such nonsense. The closest we get to any tab/slot
action is the soulful claim that they fit together like two perfect pieces of
the same puzzle. There have been occasions where I’ve forgotten they were even
naked.
But enough
about the bad, let’s talk “good” sex. (Do I hear a chorus of “Yes, please!)
Because really, there’s nothing better than good sex—unless of course it’s
great sex. But I digress.
Writing
good sex is a careful blend of the examples of bad sex we just talked about. It
shouldn’t be a block of emotional connections that switches into the “meat” of
sex. (Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.)
A touch
should evolve both a physical and emotional response. Those responses should graduate
exponentially with where you are in the love scene. Which makes sense, right?
You don’t want them to have an emotional climax while still in the petting phase
of loving-making.
Writing
good sex is very difficult, which is probably why I don’t like to do them. That
being said, after hours of pulling out my hair, agonizing over just the right
words and making sure body parts can actually bend and twist as I’ve written
them; I am always pleased with the final draft of my love scenes.
Always take
into consideration when in the story the love scene takes place, the
circumstances of both the physical and emotional situation of both characters, and above all else the storyline. If they need to have sex in Chapter One (God,
help you!) make it happen believably.
Final words/advice if you're an author: write what feels right.
Am I wrong?
Right? Or left some vital piece of helpful information out? Let me know. I’m
always in search of an easier way to write sex.
By the way,
did I tell you that I have just agreed to write an erotic novella? I’m such a
glutton for punishment!
Kathy Shaw’s
latest release is BLONDIE AND THE HITMAN, a Darla Bodecker mystery, and is a humorous mystery with a dash
of romance. Buy her book here.
Interesting post, Kathy. I, as a reader, did not know sex scenes were so hard to write. They seem to come at the right time in the books I read. I will certainly appreciate the effort it takes in future books I read!
ReplyDeleteKarren, I hope the blog didn't come off as whiney. Some writers can do sex with their eyes closed. (Hee Hee) I'm just not one of them. The best sex scenes are the ones where the reader is so absorbed in the story that they don't realize there's a world outside of what they are reading.
DeleteThanks for the comment. Hoped I entertained you!
Yes, Kathy, your post was entertaining. IMHO, writing anything, not just sex, and writing it so it flows and is believable and compelling is hard. A book that reads "easy" took a lot of hard work. Every writer has certain scenes that are more difficult on a personal level so a writer may start in one genre but then gravitate to a different genre that's a better "fit." Fortunately, with indie publishing, you can find your own niche where every scene, albeit difficult, is a joy to write. Btw, that's a really cute book cover.
ReplyDeleteAmen, sister! Well said.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment and the kudos for the cover. I'm very proud of it.
Great post, Kathy.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Caroline. And thanks for the help.
DeleteThe blogger crashed on me... Anyway, I said...I know a number of writers who don't like to write sex/love scenes. But for me they are a continuance of the feelings between the hero and heroine and can up the stakes or change the dynamic of their relationship. To me every touch and reaction is a part of the story between them. Which to me in some ways makes the love scenes and integral part of the whole love story.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Kathy!